Isaiah 43:5

Do not be afraid, for I am with you; I will bring your children from the east and gather you from the west. Isaiah 43:5

Monday, October 28, 2013

First Weeks Home......(part three/six weeks)

feeling loved and secure!
     October 24th, marked week six since arriving home with Lucy from China!  She's feeling increasingly more comfortable with her big family and new country!  We know this for a variety of reasons but namely because her "warm up time" has decreased significantly.  The first week home, it would take an hour or more after getting up from nap to want to do anything other than lay in my arms. Six weeks later, she gets up and is pretty much "ready to go!"  She has and still  wants Mama (and sometimes Daddy) to hold her  the times we do go out and about and when arriving at an unfamiliar place.  But instead of staying glued to my lap, she has figured out that if Mom and Dad are ok with this place, then  it must be an ok place to be!  She will then venture off my lap (making sure Mom is within sight), and begin to check things out.

 We also know Lucy girl is more comfortable with us, because she's feeling more secure in showing her emotions and feelings.  Laughing more frequently when she's amused, occasionally singing (in Chinese),  showing mad or angry feelings via a temper tantrum, and "testing" us when not quite sure if Mom and Dad will think something is "ok" or not.   Sounds like a pretty typical three year old, huh?!
   Recently when holding our grandson, Isaac, Lucy was feeling pretty jealous.  Her Mama was holding and loving on another little person!  W-h-a?    She wasn't sure what to do with those tough feelings (and not having language to convey them to us!!) so she threw herself on the living room floor (with a thud!).   That particular little outburst of emotion showed me several things.  1)  She really is attaching strongly to Mom (if she wasn't, she wouldn't care if I was holding another child)!  2)  She has feelings and reactions when something doesn't "feel" right that are typical and appropriate for three year old children.  *Admitting here that in my twenty five years of parenting, I don't think I've ever looked at a throw yourself on the floor tantrum as "good!"  Wisdom comes from experience.  Having  parented both adopted and bio. children, I'm putting myself out there as saying I  interpret this as GOOD NEWS at this juncture in our adoption.*   And obviously, we will help her to understand and work through those feelings just as we have her seven siblings older than she!

   Getting into the car seems to continue to cause our girl anxiety (because she doesn't know where we are headed).  Hoping to help alleviate some of her anxiety,  I took photos of places we frequent and my dad laminated them for me and put them on a large ring.   If we're headed to church, I'll get the photo ring and get down on Lucy's level and explain to her in a few key English words while pointing - first I'll show her the picture of "Lucy's car" (our minivan) and say "First car", then "church" (while showing her picture of the outside of our church building), then "sing" (showing her a picture we  took during worship and praise time at church.  She L-O-V-E-S this form of communication and you can see her relax while repeating back the words in English to me and looking at the photos.  This works well when we're returning to a place she's been because it sparks a visual memory of being there before.  The language barrier is still tough.  We can mime, show pictures, etc. but some things you just can't convey without words.  For those of you wondering if we've used a  translator or an app. with Chinese/English language- we've tried but it doesn't work - whether it's because of her age or if there's a dialect that was spoken in her province making the words unfamiliar to her, we're just not sure.
Our picture ring
      She continues to L.O.V.E. jumping on the trampoline with her brothers.  In fact so much so that we need to spell J-U-M-P so that she doesn't know what we're saying unless she's actually getting to go to the trampoline!  She can be an adorable little helper too.  She along with her siblings clears her table setting and helps with putting away clean silverware.  Another favorite is helping with putting dirty wash into the washer or pulling clean wash out and into the basket.  She's learning quickly that responsibilities are part of family life and doing a super job with it!  This  also helps her to feel a part of the family, as she watches others do household chores, she too has them!


   Lucy Kim also loves wiping down anything and everything if you give her a wet rag. 
Have rag will clean!
Another favorite past time for Lucy  is to pour, scoop and shake up dry beans!  I have a big tub of them and I lay out an old sleeping bag, plop her in the middle of the bag with the bin of beans and containers to fill and she's entertained for a while!

Yep, sometimes I just climb right in the bean container!

     Lucy also enjoys visiting her grandparents and has fun "playing" or "reading' with them.
Puzzles with Pop
Lucy L.O.V.E.S. music and often "helps" Mom-Mom play the piano
"reading" with Grandma and Grandpa Z.
  Not many three year old girls can tout the "aunt" title!  But Lucy Kim can!  She doesn't understand it all yet, but she is super blessed to have a niece who is seven months younger. (and a baby nephew who just turned one)  Both Lucy and her niece, Sadie, are learning that "Mama/Nana" has plenty of love for both of them!! I think they'll be best friends!
Playing with toys Sadie's Mommy (aka: Lucy's big sister) played with a L-O-N-G time ago!
My littlest lovies!
We've had a beautiful October here in Pennsylvania and have been able to be outdoors often!
"Baby Kimmy" is not quite in hand as much as she was a few weeks ago but she is always nearby!  She continues to be Lucy's "security" item of choice.  We  DO NOT get into the car, bed or go to a new place without making sure we have Kimmy!
On October 27th, Lucy celebrated her Daddy's birthday for the very first time!
Happy Birthday Daddy!
   As you can see and read, Qu Yan has had many and varied experiences in the past six weeks since arriving in the United States!  She's learning so much.  Her brain has got to be on major overload with the language aspect alone!  She's a sponge for sure and she's also learning what it means to be part of a family, what it means to have parents who love her unconditionally, and she's been such a trooper!  Oh how very thankful we are that we put our "yes" on the table when God called us adopt her!!  
   We pray over her (and our other children) each night thanking God that He created her, loved her, protected her and led her family to her!  She was waiting without a voice in an orphanage on the other side of the world but she wasn't forgotten.  Her Heavenly Father held her in the palm of His hand.  She has already blessed all of us more than we can recount in words.  God is GOOD and FAITHFUL all the time and to HIM we give all the praise and glory!
   Until next time.....



  1. Love you girl! So thankful for God's story in your life. He is such a good and loving Father and I praise Him for little Lucy! Hugs! KW

  2. Loved as always! Kim, you are an excellent writer. Thanks for sharing with all of us!

    1. Thanks Rhon -- you are such a wonderful cheerleader and prayer warrior. You recognize that your faithful prayers were heard, right!!! To God be the glory!

  3. I love reading these updates. That little outfit of hers with the lantern is so cute! I'm so excited for your family and have been inspired, convicted, and spurred on by the love your (entire) family shows so freely. You and Merle have such an amazing reward waiting for you in heaven because of your faithfulness and generosity! Seriously, Jake and I talk about you guys a lot!

    1. Thank you for your kind words Lindy! Like Paul(?) said "if there is any good in me - it's b/c of Jesus!" To Him be the glory.
      I love that you noticed and liked her lantern outfit!! It's very special as I purchased it from a fellow adoptive Mama who made it for their auction to help w/ funds for the 2 orphans they were bringing home from China. The skirt has little Chinese girls on it!! :)

  4. I loved getting to "meet" Lucy at church yesterday. Couldn't keep my eyes off her. Beautiful. Fortunate to be part of a loving family. Jean Slagle

  5. Hi,
    I just found your blog through Julie (Ellie's mom). I live in the same town as Julie and share her name! WE adopted our daughter,. Mia, from Shaanxi on August 2011, she was 9 years old at the time. We had lots of trouble trying to communicate with her, too. Our guide in China told us that Mia had a very strong local dialect and even the guide was having trouble understanding her. We used translators, both electronic and human...with no luck. It was a trying process, but it didn't take long until we could communicate. Mia is from Ankang City, previously she was in Hanbin CWI. Congratulations on your new daughter!! I look forward to following your blog.