They're ALL "Our Own"

After we adopted our boys, every now and then I'd be in conversation with someone and I'd hear something like "what about your own" children or referring to another adoptive family, they'd ask "are they their own?"
I know what is meant when the question/comment  is made but I always feel this little stab in my heart.  I also get an immediate ache for my adopted children (who thankfully have never been present when the comment has been made).  The comment/question is usually made when trying to differentiate between a biological child and an adopted child.  However, as Mama to ALL of my children, there is no distinction between biological and adopted children.  They're grafted in.  We're family.  They are all truly 100% "our own" children.  Period.

I recognize that those comments are made with absolutely zero intention of causing any kind of hurt.  But this post is being written just to throw out some "food for thought."   As I mentioned in an earlier post, sometimes it's best to put ourselves in another's shoes and think of how the comment may resonate with us if we were on the other side.  Hearing "are they your own" could be interpreted to a child as "I'm not truly theirs!"  or "I'm less of a son/daughter to my parents then my sisters and brothers who were biologically grafted into the family?"